The magnificent harbour with its internationally recognisable bridge and opera house has been used to perpetrate fraud for decades. Dumping criminals and political agitators directly into botany bay many years ago, may have had something to do with it. These days Sydney harbour is the Venus fly trap of Australia, tempting visitors and migrants with its stunning vistas, gorgeous victorian sandstone facades and international city status, but reveals upon arrival rented brick veneer, storm fencing and only RSLs shamefully filled with pokies to dull the regret. Behind the glamour of the harbour and exclusive suburbs there are bland, squeezed suburbs whose only interesting feature is regular flooding due to inadequate drainage. Unless you are a crime lord running night clubs and drug cartels, a financial wizard who can talk retirees out of their super or your ancestors were slave traders, you ain’t going to be living with a harbour view and a pontoon for the cruiser, any time soon. The best you can do is three hours a day standing on a train daydreaming about shooting your boss or getting a granite kitchen worktop. Commuting in Sydney drives you mad. Sydney is a beautiful lady on stage, she winks, teases and beckons. But back stage you find you were seduced by an old man in drag and he wants to use you, right now.
Having attracted so many people and crammed them together in such a short time, tempers flair and Sydney now enjoys large scale drug problems, impatience, greed, violent crime, despair, corruption, grid lock, this rage, that rage and all the general nastiness that are the benefits of being a world class city.
Admire this throbbing metropolis, plugged hard and fast into the modern technological world’s cutting edges, but watch your backs , that lovely friendly local you met just minutes ago has your wallet and already maxed out your credit cards with electrical goods and if you are quick, you can place a winning bid for them on ebay before the police have time to throw your crime incident report into the bin, Sydney really is world class.
So you been to circular quay and eaten a kebab sitting on a ferry years ago, nowadays you head off for the burbs along roads built for horses but not progressing any faster than the horses did. Commuting hell, by bus, train, car or plane the local government is the world standard for not doing anything for the future except stopping anyone who may do something for the future in case they show them up. Sydney may have the most famous Opera House in the world but you’ll never get there in time for a performance.
Please note that you may be required to remove your pants on Sydney trains:
The once popular Mardi Gras has waned so much that there is a glut of crotchless leather chaps on ebay. The once sassy Dykes on Bikes are now old ladies who should be in tweeds but the leather remains for safety and support rather than looks these days. The original and genuine euphoria of being out and proud has waned, most do not care about sexual orientation anymore and there really is a finite number of times “YMCA” and “Its Raining Men” can get the party going.
Sydney may not regard trains and buses as a priority but when it comes to fireworks there is nothing more important. Sydney knows that social cohesion is gunpowder based and whenever the harbour set to be blown up, over a million will turn up to ‘ooh and aah’ before realising they are stranded. To Australia’s other cities the fireworks are a pertinent representation of Sydney, …. after the fireworks and the harbour what is there?